Have you ever come across people who are really sickly positive? Like they almost seem fake? I'm all for positive thinking, but a recent discussion made me realise that there are times when its important to understand what another person is going through. Sometimes we feel we need to say something to help someone and it can turn on us. The Australian 'she'll be right mate' attitude can be great but sometimes so insensitive to what a person is going through. If you are going to be a good friend there's a great saying which says to weep with those who are weeping and rejoice with those who are rejoicing. If someone is down, find the right time to speak and think about what you are going to say, positivity doesn't have to be sickly sweet.

I completely agree with your post on this matter. There is nothing worse than a sickly positive person....they come across in a very slick slimey manner.

I always find the challenge is to not only say the right thing but say it in the right way. There is no point being positive and trying to cheer another person up if it's not received but you've expressed yourself poorly.

I thnk that being positive IS important but being real is as well. I know when I was going through a really difficult time I didn't want anyone to say anything profound or even to cheer me up....it was more important that the person was just there. Never underestimate the power of just being there for a person.

There is sometimes a fine line to this. I am one of those people with a constantly positive attitude and I know that sometimes I go back through a conversation in my mind once it's over and realise that I might not have responded in quite the way that person might have liked. It's not that I'm not sensitive to that other person's feelings, I am, but often it's hard to know how another person might want you to react. It's about building relationships and also developing some understanding of the different characteristics of people. If I detect that someone's personality or character is similar to someone else I already know then it's easier to guess how I should respond to that person.

Kathie M. Thomas, AFAIOP, MVA, ASO, VA Coach & Trainer
God is willing to guide you
but you must choose the direction
http://www.vadirectory.net/blog/ VA Blog
http://www.kathiethomas.com Speaker, Author
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Being positive in the right way and sensitive at the same time is learned with practice. In the nursing profession, we have to build therapeutic relationships with people which are positive and empathetic. For example, recently I had to tell the mother of a 3 year old with newly diagnosed diabetes that her son would have this condition for the rest of his life, and it was not something that would just go away or heal by itself. The manner in which I delivered that message was crucial to the subsequent way in which the mother would handle the information. I had to be extremely gentle, but at the same time point out that the condition can be managed and she would be taught how to do that.
Encouraging this family positively in the midst of them coming to terms with such a life changing event takes a lot of sensitivity and the ability to listen and assess where they are at with it all and act accordingly. It is definitely a learned thing and I encourage everyone to not be afraid to practice as situations arise that you can help in. You learn with practice. God helps you in that too.

Rubyleeangel.